"Fire over the Prairie"
在血海中，太阳用尽所有的活力想向上撑爬, 但总不免沉沦下去。不知西山有什么魔力，张开口把它下吞，不给半刻的停留。 在西天一边的宇宙舞台上，一幕悲剧已演了终结。 红的，黄的，橙的投射灯，渐渐收了光芒，黑幕徐徐地降下。
幕闭了，台上台下都陷在模糊的苍暗中。 悲哀的诗人一再为死去的太阳流眼泪，穷学生想捕捉那些微的残光，富人和贵人却刚刚起床，人人都抱着一个共同的等待。 突然电灯一亮，霓虹灯管也陆续布满四方。 夜来了，像一阵寒风掠过人们的身边，有些重，有些轻，于是酒巴和菜馆热闹起来。 舞厅的地板又开始震动，繁华的街市发出混杂的喧嘈，女人又袒露开的乳头给人抚摩，疲倦的工人像死了般躺下来睡去。
我讨厌这麻醉的气氛，这消沈的污魂。 一个思念浮现在我的脑海上——我要追随那已消失的太阳。 我要穷究它的去向，我要把它带回来，永远不让它给时光带走。 高挂在这人间上，从此没有一隅的黑暗，没有薄霞的心影。 决定了，我仰头望望灰色的西天，一片渺小的浮云向着无涯的尽处荡去。 我像收了极大的感慨，开步就向西边奔走。
我没有回家告诉爸娘一声，我没有朋友告别，我知道爱人这时正倚在窗前等候着我。 但是我还知道一件在一切之上的事情—— 我要去找寻那死去了的太阳。
穿过热闹的街市，我看见妖艳的女人，架起两条露出粉红色底裤的肉腿，在驾驶着前面骷髅般的手车夫。 我看见肥胖的阔人骑在饿瘦的人背上。 这些鬼影只在黑夜中才出现，我狠毒地射他们几眼。 最害怕的是在这里碰到个熟人。
不好了，邻人把我叫止，问我那里去。 我不想理会他，但他偏要把着我的臂膀不放。 我被迫着要告诉他说我要去找寻那死了的太阳。 他说我疯狂。 我到底获得了自由，就把他抛在后面，他还高叫了我几声。 也好，反正都是一样，说我是疯了也罢，我还是要向着西边走。
在市的尽头一个警察挡住我的去路，我愤怒地一拳把他打倒。
贵人门前的叭儿狗追着我汪汪地叫。 充满了追求热情的鼓舞，我没有理会它。 谁料它却以为得势，竟来扯我的裤脚，我讨厌地一脚把它踢开。 它头也不回地垂下尾巴，向着贵人门前的黑暗中消失。 我吃吃地冷笑起来。
天乌黑了， 我回头望望模糊红影中的都市，心里细声地向它告别。 望着前面西天的黑暗，我有着无限的期望。 一阵寒风吹刮着薄衣所遮的皮肤，我有点懊悔不曾回家穿上衣裳。 但是一转念，我紧束了宽衣，迈步向着西边奔走。
我哼着人道战歌，忘了的寒冷，忘了暂时的黑暗。 前面走来几个夜进城寻乐的朋友，他们半痴半醉地要我跟着他们回城去饮酒。 我随意的招呼一声，说要到城郊找祖母。 这回我确实说了谎，我何尝有祖母在村庄？
野狗的叫声远了。 背后都市的残影也早已在黑夜中消失。 四边是漆黑的围墙，天空也不曾微露了光芒。 我完全陷在孤寂的黑暗中。 我总还有着那伟大的热望。 心中有着无限的温暖，就是单独的走路，也不会害怕，因为我有着走路的对象和目的。 从衣袋里，我取出一根纸烟，在黑暗中燃起一点的光芒，就借着这仅有的光芒，我又兴奋地赶着我的路程。
摸索地前进着，风吹得更紧，寒气把空中的水份在我的头上结起霜，我机械地用手抚摸一下冷冰冰的头发。 突然左脚踏了空，身体向上漂浮，一滚就倒下一个山坑，痛苦就趁机从我的背骨钻进。是谁掘下这个陷阱？ 是谁布置这杀人的机关？ 我不顾背上的痛苦，我不能永远躺在这里，我要去迎接那伟大的太阳。 我不能死在这里，他们不能关闭我在这个牢窟。 我有力量，我要奋斗，爬出这里去。 在黑暗中拖着苦痛的背骨移动。 一个冰冷的柔软东西触着我手尖的神经。 缩手迟疑了一会，我再伸出手掌去抚摸。 呀！ 原来是一个十岁左右的小孩子。 我触到他的心房还有点温暖。 我不顾一切的寒冷，除下外衣把小孩子包裹起来。 渐渐他醒来了， 我问许多话，他都没有回答。 我心里想，或许他受了大的打击，大的灾难吧。 但是为什么他也会躺在这人掘的陷阱中呢？ 但是无论如何我要把他救出坑来。 我在下面推着他向上爬，幸喜这坑不甚高，我自己也忍痛地跳出了。
我拖着孩子的手继续向西边去。 我不再是孤独的夜行者，我有我的伴侣， 我更加兴奋，忘却了外间的寒冷和黑暗。
我们在黑暗中，已经走了很远的路程，但是还未找到太阳丝毫的踪影。寒风刮得我那没有外衣的身体，有点受不住了。 孩子止了步。 一个沉重的声音在黑暗中震动： “你到底要把我卖到何方？” 我受了迎头的打击，就在漆黑中我也看出他那狰狞残忍的面庞。 我没有回答他，只狠狠地射出我那逼人的眼光，怀着愤怒， 我回身就向前面走。 突然我的脑后起了一个轰动，眼前的一切都在摇晃，我滚下山来，晕去了。
在我醒来的时候，一个美丽的长发女郎站在我的面前。 “你是谁？” 我口喃喃地说，努力想站起来。 脚上的一阵剧痛几乎使我一再昏晕，原来我的脚受伤了。 她连忙向前把我扶住，替我抚摩那受伤的足。 不知何时寒风住了，星儿在乌黑的天幕上闪着，大地和暖起来。
“你是谁？” 我忍不住又好奇地问。 她只是微笑地抚治我的创伤，不肯回答我一句。
「你现在行行看。」她把我扶起后这样说。
我走着，勉强装出很自然的姿势，虽然左脚还负着伤，背骨还是一样苦痛，而且我相信头部的血迹还没有干。 我挽着她的手，什么再大的困难我也愿意接受。 走着，走着，我几乎要跳起舞来。
“青年， 往西边走？”
“是的。 你怎么知道？”
“我自然知道。 一看你的面，我就认识你的心。 你不是第一个，相信也不是最后一个。”
“你也是去寻求失去的太阳么？”
“不是。 我奉了祖父的命令在这里守候着像你这样过往的人。 人们来到这里，多少也受着伤。 我的任务是医治他们，送他们回家，或是鼓舞他们前进。”
“谁是你的祖父，他在哪里? 我要见他。”
“他早已死了，死在那寻求太阳的热望中。 青年，假如你还有勇气的话，你有一天会走到他埋葬的地方。”
“是的，我一定会。” 我自言自语地说。
“青年，你还有家么？”
“有，我家有父母，还有着最值得恋念的爱人。”
“青年，听我的劝告，回家吧。”
“不，我要把那死去的太阳找回来。”
“老实告诉你，以后的路程比你所走过的还要艰难千万倍。 这是一条独方向的路，只有去，没有回的。 我从来没有见过一个能够回来的人。” 她富有感情地说：“这些路不是你应该走的。 你家还有父母，还有爱人，听从我的话，回去吧。”
“不，女郎，我感谢你的劝 ，但是我的志向已经立定了。 假如我不能把太阳带回来，我就愿意死在这荒原上，让我的肉体腐烂，从骨髓里发出永不消失的麟光，照耀那未来寻求者的去路。 你的祖父何曾因为家庭而抛去自己的责任呢？”
“青年， 我恭祝你有这样坚强的意志，那么勇敢地前进吧。 假如你愿意归来的时候，我在这里等你。 你的回来不是懦弱的表示，我保证没有人会讥笑你。 我们的事业不是一刻可以成功，也不是牺牲了许多人的鲜血，就可以永远保存下去。 所以，人人的动机是自主的，我不能强迫你去做。 革命工作的完全成功是以个人的内心为出发点，也是这个内心为归结点。 去吧，青年，我今天才送走了小弟弟和母亲。 假如你走得快的话，你还可以追及他们的。 有了伴侣，就犹如有了新的力量，你就永远不会受孤独的空虚所压迫的。
“他们要到哪里去呢？”
“我的母亲是护送小弟弟到祖母处去的。 祖母年纪老了，要有新的生命来继续她那燃灯的工作，这是父亲死时的遗嘱。 祖母就在祖父的埋葬处。 那点黑暗中唯一的火是要永生的，好让它来引导所有后来者，给我们一个大前夕的希望。现在你去吧，青年，我深信你会把太阳带回来的。
“女郎， 你住在哪里? 让我送你回家。”
“不，你没有这多余的时间。 去吧！在你听到钟声响的时候，我就来迎接你回来。 再见了，青年。”
“女郎，女郎。”
她就在我的呼声中消失了。 天空的星渐渐给黑暗蚀去。 天地间一再是漆黑的一hoqeayiopppp。 寒风又刮起来。 我懊悔不该让那孩子夺取我的外衣。 拖着创伤的身体， 我又勇敢地前进。
在凹凸的崎路上，我不知倒了多少次，遍身都是污泥，又加上寒风的侵袭， 我不知又添了多少创伤。 在一棵树旁我停了脚步，取了一枝烟来慢慢地吸着喘息。 漫漫的乌黑， 没有一个明确的去处，连我自己的影子也给黑暗夺去。 虽然过着我一生从未尝过的幸苦，但是我还没有归的思念。 我相信那女郎的话，我一定能够把太阳带回来。 不然我依照自己的誓言，躺下在这荒野上死去。 我想起了家，家中的父母，更有那最值得恋念的爱人。 但是为了那死去的太阳，我不能不把自己的所爱牺牲了。 “原谅我吧！” 我的心细声地恳求，眼睛疲倦得栊合起来，我差不多要入睡了。
突然一个声音把我惊醒。 我发见了孩子的哭声，这哭声像电流一般触着我的神经。 我忘了一切的疲倦，头，背和足上的创伤，疯狂地向着这哭声奔走。 在黑暗的原野上，我的呼叫声音在太空中震动，孩子的哭声渐渐地响亮起来了。
在我的面前，一个垂死的妇人抱着号叫的婴孩。 我知道他们一定是女郎的母亲和弟弟。 同情地我点着头，她就在微笑中把孩子递给我。 死去。
我把她的尸体用树叶埋葬后，就脱下仅有的上衣，把孩子裹在我的怀里， 随着她先人遗骸的一点绿光，我们前进着。 寒风像刀般刮着我赤裸的上身。 我紧紧地相偎着孩子，希望互相得到一点温暖。 但是我的身体开始战抖，在黑暗的原野上起了第一声的咳嗽。 我不顾身上的创伤，咬实牙根向前迈步走。
泥泞的原野和着缓慢的脚步，无情的雨水尽在我的身上下降。 我的头开始发热，咳嗽的声音也渐渐响亮加密。 我知道自己病了。 但是孩子还在我的怀里， 这好像是一个使命，我非完成它不可，我断不能躺下在这里死去。 这孩子如果不被送到那方，恐怕千千万万的生命要白白地牺牲去。 我把腰弯下来保护怀中的孩子。 在原野上挣扎着我和许多人的生命。 我没有懊悔，因为这是我自己亲手种下来的苦果。 我也不灰心，虽然身上的创伤有时使我低声地呻吟，但是我还不曾流过弱者的眼泪。
我的下半身完全麻木了，但是我那没精力的双腿还勉强地移动。 这时我正渡着冰冷冷的河沟。 河水乌黑黑的一片，反影着天空唯一的黑暗。 这遥遥的路程那时方尽呢！我爬上了泥泞的对岸，让那润湿的水泥陷着我那疲倦的躯体。 躺下来嚅着稀微的残息，我恐怕就会死了。 不知触了什么灵感，我的口不自主地呼唤了两声女郎。 举头望望远方，预备闭上眼睛死去。 一点微弱的光，在黑暗的四围中，强烈地射进我的眼睛，燃起我生命的动力。 我努力地想爬起来，但是两腿不接纳中枢的命令。 我挣扎了好几次才真站起来。 一刻又倒下，但我不灰心。 目前正摆着光明的希望，我万不能就这样放下责任，我站起来，向前直奔。 狂风暴雨起了。 我抱着头拼命地冲，倒下来，又爬起，在碎石尖上，我被刺破了手。 雷声和电光一齐发作，我没有半点害怕，反而让我在黑暗中看见一切。 渐渐近了，这点仅有的光。 我伏在地上爬行，在门前的石阶上，我听到怀中孩子的哭声，接着模糊地听来开门的声音。 后来我完全失了知觉了。
雨止了，我起身辞别老妇人，感谢她给我的新衣裳。 有了一顿充足的餐， 我不再像个病弱的垂死者。 我拉开了门望望在黑空中跳舞的电光，回过头来说出这句话。
“妇人，感谢你给我的一切，现在我要去完成你丈夫所余下的工作了。”
“青年，保重你自己。 感谢你给我送来孙儿。 我已经感到有千千万万的羣众向着这方向奔来了。 为他们开路吧！”
我头也不回地就向前面的黑暗中消失。 我知道，老妇在门前站了许久。
已经没有先人的遗骸，我已失了跟从的麟光。 借着空中的电光，我走着最后一段路程。
在荒芜的枯林中，有着闷人的气氛，夜狼的叫声，凶兽的吼叫。 密尖的树枝毁去我的衣裳，荆棘刺破我的皮肤。 我嗅到自己流血的腥味，但是我还是一样勇敢地前进。 让孤独永远栖在我的身上，我的心还是要像太阳一般给万物带来生命。 外面虽然寒冷，我的心还是火一般热。 有着人类的爱，有着光明的欲望，我的灵魂永远不会死去。
电光一亮，雷声一响，一根枯树干跟着倒下，我底生命的一线联系也像跟着这根树干断了。 我知道没有时间给我躲避，只得双手抱着头，等候死神的降临。
死神没有把我带走，它要给我更大的苦受。 我用力推开了树干，想站起来 ，没有半点办法，我已成了残废的人了。 属我的，只还剩下一双唯一没有受伤的眼睛。我看见前面顽大石块的山，我忍受一切的痛苦向上爬去。
我已经没法走出这深林了。 为了后来者的前途，这原野上的障碍是要铲除的。 我从袋里取出一盒火柴，就在这原野上的枯林中放下火种。 我自己的一切都完了，可惜不曾把太阳迎回来。 呀！就让这火毁去我的尸体吧。
在山上，我展开两手， 吸着最后的一息空气，就像十字架一般悬挂在上面。 下面四围燃着猛烈的火，火焰的长舌伸到我的身旁。 东方已经不是黑暗的一片，纯洁的白光布开一条濶大的道路，太阳就出来了。 我低声地叩开了心门： “泪儿，出来吧。 看看光明的太阳要出来了。 我没有骗过你，虽然我和你都不能见到它的降临，但是你也知道它是会来的。 泪儿一涌而出，它也流着眼泪。
为迎接阳光，我已经毁去这座枯林了。 钟声在我的耳旁响着。 我记起了女郎的话。 时候已经到了，我俯头看看四围的火光，再举头望着光明的一面，说出生命终结的最后一句话：
“呀！这原野上的火！”
In a sea of blood the sun exerts all its energy striving to rise up, but it cannot avoid sinking. No one knows the magical power of the western mountain. It opens its mouth and swallows up the sun, and does not leave it any moment to linger on. On the west side of the sky, an act of tragedy has performed its ending on the world stage. The reflection of red, yellow and orange lights gradually dim their brightness, and the dark curtain slowly comes down.
The curtain is closed. On and off the stage all has fallen into an obscure darkness. The sorrowful poet has repeatedly cried for the death of the sun. Poor students want to catch that little bit of dim light, while the rich and the noble just get up from their beds. What everyone embraces is a common waiting. Suddenly the electric lights are lit up, and the neon lights follow and spread out everywhere. The night has arrived—— like a gust of chill wind, some heavy and some light——sweeping past people. Then the bars and restaurants begin to bustle with activities. The floorboards of the dance halls start shaking again. The prosperous downtown streets break out a mixture of boisterous noises. Women expose their nipples again for people to fondle, and the exhausted laborers lie down and sleep away like dead.
I loathe this kind of numbing atmosphere, this dejected, dirty spirit. A thought flashes in my mind: I want to pursue after that lost sun; I want to investigate its destination; I want to bring it back and will not let time ever take it away. When the sun hangs high above the world, there will not be a corner in darkness nor a shadow of a slight sunset reflected in our hearts. I’ve decided. Raising my head, I look at the gray western sky as a distant tiny cloud drifts towards the boundless horizon. As if being deeply emotionally disturbed, I start running towards the west.
I would not return home to tell my parents, nor would I say farewell to my friends. I know my lover is still leaning by the window waiting for me. I also know a matter that is above all else: I want to search for that sun that has died.
Walking through the bustling street, I see a glamorous and coquettish woman crossing her bare legs and showing her pink undies, and she is riding on the skeleton-like rickshaw man in front of her. I see a fat, ostentatious man bestriding the back of a skinny hungry man. All these ghostly shadows appear only in the dark night. With malicious eyes, I scan over them a few times. What I fear most is running into someone I know at this place.
Oh no! My neighbor calls and stops me, asking where I am going. I don’t want to attend to him, but he won’t let go of my arm. I am forced to tell him I am going to search for that dead sun. He says I am crazy. Finally I get hold of my freedom and leave him behind. He continues shouting at me a few times. Just as well, in either way he is just saying I am crazy, but I am still going to the west.
At the end of the city boundary, a police officer blocks my way, and I furiously punch him down.
A Pekingese dog in front of the door of a high class household is chasing after and barking at me. With full enthusiasm in my pursuit I pay no attention to it. Who would have thought that the dog takes it as being on the upper hand and comes pulling at the bottom of my trousers. I kick it away in disgust, and the dog drops its tail running without looking back and disappears in the darkness in front of the patrician’s door. I giggle and snigger.
The sky has darkened. I turn back and look at the blurry red shadow of the metropolitan, and quietly say farewell in my heart. Looking at the darkness of the western sky ahead, I have immeasurable expectations. A gust of cold wind is scraping the skin under my thin shirt. I regret I didn’t go home to put on more clothing. But on second thought, I tighten my loose shirt and take a large step and run toward the west side.
I am humming the battle song of humanity, forgetting the cold, forgetting the momentary darkness. Approaching are a few friends who head to the city looking for fun. They are half stun and half drunk, wanting me to join them back to the city drinking. I casually greet them and say I am going to see my grandmother in the suburbs. This time I have indeed lied. When do I have a grandmother in the suburbs?
The barking sound of wild dogs fades in the distance, and the remnant shadow of the city from behind is disappearing into darkness. All four sides are black walls, while the sky has not shown any tiny bit of light. I am completely sunk in the lonely darkness, but I still have that great desire of pursuit, so my heart consists of immense warmth. Even if I walk alone, I am not afraid because I have an objective and purpose in my journey. I take out a cigarette from my pocket and light up a bit of brightness in the dark. And relying on this exclusive brightness, I continue pushing on my journey again with excitement.
I am feeling my way forward. The wind blows harder, and the vapor on top of my head has freezed up into frost in the cold air. While I mechanically touch my icy cold hair, my left foot suddenly skips a step and my body floats up in the air and then tumbles down to a mountain pit. Pains take charge and drill into my backbones. Who dug this pitfall? Who planned this killer trap? I don’t care about the pains in my back; I can’t lie here forever: I have to go and greet that great sun. I can’t die in this place. They can’t lock me up in this trapped pit. I have strength; I must struggle to climb out of here. Dragging my painful spine I move in the darkness. A cold and soft object shocks the nerves at the tip of my fingers. I pull my hand back and hesitate for a while. I reach out again and touch it with my palm. Ah! It turns out to be a child about ten years of age. I sense that his chest still has a little warmth. I ignore the cold and take off my outer garment to wrap up the child. Gradually he wakes up. I ask him many questions, but he does not reply at all. I thought perhaps he had experienced a major misfortune or calamity. But why is he also lying in this manmade trap? Regardless, I will get him out of this pit. Fortunately this pit is not deep; pushing him up from the bottom, I also bear my pains and climb out.
I hold the child’s hand and continue westward. I am no longer a lonely night traveler, as I have a companion now. I am more excited, forgetting the external cold and darkness.
We have walked a very far distance in the dark, but unable to find any trace and shadow of the sun. The cold wind batters my body which has no outer garment, making me nearly unbearable now. The child stops his footstep and a heavy voice trembles in the darkness, “Where are you going to sell me to in the end?” I feel a strike coming right into my head. Even if it is in the dark I can see his ferocious and cruel face. I don’t answer him, while brutally projecting my pressing eyesight at him. In anger I turn around and just walk forward. Suddenly I feel a sensation at the back of my head, and everything in front of my eyes is swaying. I tumble down the hill and pass out.
When I awake, a beautiful lady with long hair is standing in front of me. I mumble, “Who are you?” I try hard to stand up, but the sharp pain in my foot almost makes me faint again. It turns out my foot is wounded. She quickly steps forward and holds me up, then she rubs my wounded foot. I don’t know when the cold wind has stopped, and the stars are sparkling in the pitch-black sky. The earth is warming up.
“Who are you?” Curiously I can’t help asking again. She just smiles and takes care of my wound, unwilling to answer me.
“Let’s see you try to walk a little now,” she says after holding me up.
I walk on, forcing a false natural posture. Although my left foot is wounded, my spine is also still in pain, and I believe the blood stain on my head has not yet dried. Holding on to her hand, I am willing to take on what may be the most severe difficulty. I walk on and on, and I almost seem to start dancing.
“Young man, going west?”
“Yes, how do you know?”
“Naturally I know. Just a glance at your face I have known your heart. You are not the first one, and I believe you won’t be the last.”
“You too are going to search for the lost sun?”
“No, I am taking the command of my grandfather to wait here for passersby like you. When people arrive here they are more or less wounded. My duty is to treat them, send them home, or encourage them to continue forward.”
“Who is your grandfather? Where is he? I want to see him.”
“He had died long ago. He died in the aspiration of searching for the sun. Young man, if you still have courage, you will someday reach the place where he is buried.”
“Yes, I certainly will,” I am talking to myself.
“Young man, do you have a family?”
“I do. I have my parents and a lover most worthy of love.”
“Young man, listen to my advice and go home.”
“No, I want to search and bring back the dead sun.”
“Let me tell you the truth. The road ahead is tens of thousands times more difficult than what you have gone through. This is a one-way path, and there is only a forward direction and no return. I have never seen a person who could return.” Speaking with emotion she says, “These are not the roads you should travel. You have parents at home and you have your loved one. Follow my words and go home.”
“No, lady, thank you for your exhortation, but my aspiration has been established. If I cannot bring back the sun, I am willing to die on this prairie, letting my flesh rot and my bone marrow emit lasting luminescence to shine on the road for future pursuers. Your grandfather had never forsook his responsibility due to having a family.”
“Young man, I congratulate you for having a strong will. So you shall bravely advance forward. If you want to return, I will be waiting here for you. Your return is not a sign of weakness, and I promise no one will ridicule you. Our cause cannot be succeeded in a short time, nor would it exist forever after much fresh blood was sacrificed. Therefore, everyone has one’s own motive; I cannot force you to do this. The complete success of the revolutionary task begins with the heart of the individual and it would also end in this heart. Go! Young man, I just sent away my little brother and mother today. If you walk fast enough you could catch up with them. With a companion, it is like having renewed strength. Then you will never be tormented by a sense of emptiness in being alone.
“Where are they going?”
“My mother is escorting my little brother to my grandmother's place. Grandmother is getting old, and new life is needed to continue the task of ignition. This is the will of my grandfather when he died. Grandma is where grandpa was buried. The only light in the darkness has to be kept forever to guide the late comers and give them hope before success. You better go now, young man, I truly believe you will bring back the sun.”
“Lady, where do you live? Let me send you home.”
“No, you don’t have spare time. Go now! When you hear the sound of the bell, I will welcome your return. See you again, young man.”
“Lady, lady.”
She disappears at the sound of my calling. The stars in the sky are gradually being swallowed up by darkness, and once again the sky and earth is a mass of jet black. The cold wind is stirring up again. I regret letting that child take my outer garment. Dragging my wounded body, once again with courage I continue pushing forward.
On the uneven mountainous path, I have fallen uncountable times. My whole body is covered in mud. As the cold wind continues to attack me, I do not know how many more wounds have been added to my body. I stop at the side of a tree and take out a cigarette and slowly inhale and catch my breath. The long, expanding black smoke takes on an unclear direction. Even my shadow has also been robbed by the darkness. Although I have not experienced such hardship before in my life, I do not have any desire to return. I believe that lady’s words: I certainly can bring back the sun. Otherwise, I will go in accordance with my pledge and die, lying on this road of wilderness. I think of home, my parents at home, and my lover who is the most worthy of my remembrance. But for the dead sun, I cannot but sacrifice all my love. My heart quietly implores, “Forgive me.” My eyes are so tired they shut closed, and I almost fall asleep.
Suddenly a noise wakes me up, and I detect the crying sound of a child. This crying is like an electric current shocking my nerves. I forget all my fatigue and the pains on my head, back and foot, and frenziedly run towards this crying sound. On this dark prairie, the sound of my calling echoes in the air. The child’s crying is gradually getting louder.
In front of me is a dying woman carrying a crying baby in her arms. I know they must be the lady’s mother and brother. I nod to her with understanding, and right off she hands me the child with a smile. And she dies.
I bury her with tree leaves and take off my only upper garment to wrap the child into my chest. Following the little green light from his ancestor’s remains, we are moving forward. The chill wind is like a knife scratching my naked upper body. I tightly hug the child, hoping we will mutually generate warmth. But my body begins shaking, and the first coughing sound breaks out in the dark prairie. I ignore the pains on my body, firmly gritting my teeth and striding forward.
Along with lagging footsteps and this muddy prairie, the merciless rain pours all over my body. My head begins to warm up, as the coughing sounds turn louder and more frequent. I know I have become ill, but the child is still in my arms. It is like a mission I must accomplish. I certainly cannot drop down and die here. If this child would not be delivered to the other side, I am afraid tens of thousands of lives will be sacrificed in vain. I bend down to protect the child in my bosom and struggle for my life and many lives of others on this prairie. I have no regrets because this is the bitter fruit I have planted for myself. Neither am I discouraged, despite the pains in my body that make me lightly groan at times. But I have not shed tears of the weakling.
My lower body is all numb now, while my overtired legs are still grudgingly moving. As I am crossing the icy-cold river, the black water reflects the only darkness in the sky. When will this distant journey come to an end! I climb up onto the muddy shore at the opposite side, sinking my exhausted body into the wet mud. I lie down and take in the weakening remainder of my breath. I am afraid I am going to die. Suddenly, unknowingly an inspiration reaches me, and my mouth involuntarily calls out the lady twice. I raise my head and look far into the distance, preparing to close my eyes and die away. A little dim light in the darkness intensely shines into my eyes and lights up the energy of my life. I try hard to crawl back up, but both of my legs would not comply with my mental command. I struggle a few times before I can really stand up. In a second I collapse again, but I am not discouraged, as a bright hope is set in front of me. By any means I will not let go of my responsibility. I finally stood up and straightly ran forward. The fierce wind and the violent rain are coming down. Holding my head I am charging with all my might. I fall down and I climb back up. The pointy, sharp rocks prick into my hand. Thunders roar and lightning flash at the same time. I am not a bit afraid, and rather, these give me the light to see everything in the darkness. It is nearer now, this only point of light. I crawl to the door steps, and I hear the child in my bosom crying out. Vaguely I hear the sound of the opening door. Then I completely lose my consciousness.
The rain has stopped now. I stand up to say farewell to the old woman who gave me new clothing. Having eaten a full meal, I am no longer looking like a sick and weak person who is moribund. I pull open the door and look at the dancing lightning in the dark space. I turn around and say:
“Ma'am, thank you for everything. Now I have to go to complete the task left by your husband.”
“Young man, take care of yourself. Thank you for delivering my grandson. I have sensed that tens of thousands of people are rushing towards this direction, so lead the way for them!”
Without looking back I disappear into darkness ahead. I know the old woman is standing at the door for a long time.
There are no more remains of the forerunner, and I have lost the luminescence to follow. Relying on the lightning in the sky, I continue on the final stretch of the journey.
There is a sulky atmosphere in the withered forest of the barren wilderness; there are howling of the night wolves and the roaring of wild beasts. The densely sharp branches of trees rip up my clothes, while the thistles and thorns prick into my skin. I smell the fishy odor from my blood, but I am still courageously moving forward. Let loneliness forever reside in my body, and my heart will still resemble the sun that brings life to all living creatures. It may be cold outside, but my heart is as hot as fire. With the love of humanities and the desire for hope, my soul will never die.
A lightning flashes, a thunder roars, and a withered tree trunk falls. Like this tree trunk, the connection of my lifeline is broken. I know I don’t have enough time to dodge, so I can only hold my head with both hands and wait for the god of death to arrive.
The god of death did not take me away, as he wants me to bear greater pain. I use my strength to push out the tree trunk, trying to stand up but to no avail. I have become a cripple. What is only left that belongs to me is an uninjured pair of eyes. I see ahead is an insensate, large rocky hill. I bear all my pains to climb up on it.
I have no way to get out of this forest. For the future of those latecomers, all of these obstacles in the prairie must be uprooted. I take out a box of matches and set tinder in this withered forest of the prairie. As for myself, I am all done. I regret I have not brought back the sun. Oh! Just let this fire destroy my corpse.
At the hilltop I spread out my hands like hanging on a cross, and I take in my last breath. Below, the fire is burning fiercely all around, and the long tongue of the flames is reaching to my side. It is no longer dark in the east, and the pureness of white light opens up a broad road. The sun is about to come out. Quietly I speak to my heart: “Tears, come on out and see the bright sun is about to come out. I didn’t lie to you, although you and I would not see its arrival, but you too know it will come.” Tears are gushing out, and they too are shedding tears.”
For the purpose of welcoming the sun, I have destroyed this withered forest. The bell is ringing in my ears, and I remember the words of the lady. The time has come. I look down at the fire in four directions and raise my head to see the area in brightness. I utter the final words of my ending life:
“Oh! This fire over the prairie!”